3 Ways to Kickstart Change in Therapy (Even When You’re Stuck)
Let’s be real: change can be hard.
You’re in therapy because you want to make some positive shifts, but sometimes it feels like trying to move a mountain with a teaspoon. If you’re feeling stuck or frustrated, don’t worry—you’re not alone, and you’re definitely not doomed.
In this post, we’ll cover three (realistic and doable!) strategies to help you nudge that mountain, one teaspoon at a time.
1. Set (Manageable) Goals You Actually Care About
The “New Year’s Resolution” Trap: You know how we all start January with the best intentions to wake up at 5 AM, drink green smoothies, and read 50 books? And by February, we’re back to hitting snooze and watching Netflix? Yeah, therapy goals can go the same way if we’re not careful.
Make It Personal: Instead of aiming for life-changing goals like “achieve inner peace by next Tuesday,” focus on something small and meaningful to you. Like, “I want to feel less anxious when I’m talking to my boss” or “I’d like to not want to scream when I see my to-do list.”
Celebrate the Small Wins: Did you manage to breathe before snapping at someone? Or maybe you didn’t, but at least you noticed you were about to? That’s progress! Every tiny step forward counts, so let’s celebrate those little victories.
2. Show Up and Speak Up (Even When You’d Rather Hide)
Therapy is Not a Spectator Sport: You might be tempted to let your therapist do all the talking while you nod and smile, but real talk—change doesn’t happen if you’re just along for the ride. Get in there, even if it feels awkward or uncomfortable.
The Power of Honest Complaining: Not loving how therapy is going? Think your therapist might be a little too obsessed with mindfulness? Say it! Therapy isn’t about being polite—it’s about being real. The more you tell it like it is, the more your therapist can actually help.
Take the Wheel: Therapy isn’t magic (unfortunately), so you’ve got to put in some effort too. Think of it like a road trip: your therapist can navigate, but you’re the one driving. So buckle up and let’s get moving.
3. Try (and Sometimes Fail) to Practice Outside of Sessions
Baby Steps, Not Giant Leaps: Your therapist might suggest exercises or techniques to try between sessions. Start small—like, “I’ll try this breathing exercise for one minute” small. If you can’t manage it every day, no worries. Even a little bit of practice makes a difference.
Reflect, Don’t Obsess: It’s easy to get caught up in wondering, “Am I making progress?” Instead of overanalyzing, try checking in with yourself every now and then. Maybe you’re a little less stressed than before, or you handled a tough situation better than usual. That’s progress, even if it’s not perfect.
Remember: You’re Human, Not a Robot: Expecting yourself to be perfectly consistent with all the new habits you’re working on is like expecting a cat to suddenly start obeying commands. It’s just not going to happen. Cut yourself some slack—change is hard, but you’re doing it.
Conclusion
If change feels organic like trying to turn a ship with a paddle, that’s okay. Therapy isn’t about flipping your life upside down overnight; it’s about making those small, manageable tweaks that add up over time.
So, if you’re ready to give this change thing another shot, let’s do it—one baby step (or teaspoon) at a time. And remember, even when you’re struggling, you’re still moving forward.
